hmmm… its bn sumtyms since i last rite in… well dis is due to my hardwork @ sch… Ahackz.. i dun understsnd.. how ppl manage frenster as well as blog frm sumwhere else… i dun seem to b able to fit myself in the new blig space dat i have… hmmm….
argh!!!
how i wish i cud juz make him feel wat i felt… yest was a nice outing… we wen for a swim together…. wit my youngest bro… kte tk gado pon… tp nari…. i dunno wat went wrong….
aft sch wen to mit him… den aft which… kte gado psl hp… juz coz of a stupid bloody fon…
haiz… suro antar balek pn leh jadi masalah….
bosan…….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
y cnt he understand wat i want?? all i ask for i juz attention n be thoughtful of my needs…
everitink he says goes…
i dun understand.. juz wat wrong did i do?? is it wrong of me juz to ask him to sent me to werk n fetch me bck hm?? if in d past he cn do dat w/o even me asking him to do it… y cnt he do it now?? i reali dunno wat to do … wat to tink… n wat to feel… if i cn understand dat every wkend wen he booked out… the 1st tink if he saw my face… cn make him hepi… y cnt he tink of dat way?? bkn nk mengungkit… i juz wan him to b more toughtful… if i cn make an effort to make him smile n b merry… y cnt i get dat in return?? i dun ask for anitink… i have his tym… bt wats lackin is his attention… y cnt i get dat simple tink??? y????
is it wrong of me?? y cn other couples have their partner to sacrifice their tym juz to b wit them… bt i cnt have my partner to do dat?? im reali reali dissapointed…. truly… it hurts juz to tink of it… n he will owaes do wateva i dislike juz to hurt me… n wen i does d e same to make him feel how i felt… all he will say is dat i dun care bout his feelings… everytym i tink of him.. does he tink of me??
y?? y??? y cnt i have dat simple attention dat i want??? y??????????????
truly dissapointed… wen i tried toking to him… he says all i wan is a break up… if dats wat i want… i cud have jus asked for it instead of wasting my effort trying to make him understand wat i want….
i juz ask for his… ATTENTION…. ATTENTION… ATTENTION….
IS IT DAT HARD???????
urgh….
today is my 2nd day @ hosp.. n im in the aftnn shift… how boring cn it b… oh dear… im aftnn again tmr… urgh… reali cnt tahan… den thrus n fri im morn… well… dats how my shift is…
today im reali irritated by bie… asked him to fetched me… bt he gaf me juz too much reason… im juz wondering if he’s still interested in dis rship…
dunno la.. im sooooo tired.. gonna turn in…
nitez…
well.. smlm i went out wit hubby n twinnies n faz(fiqa’s guy dat is)… we went to catch a movie @ p.s… urm ’spirit of the victim’… blardy horrible… horrible in a sense dat i was scared stiff… it was a gud movie… it soooo damn scary… i sat wit hubby.. all i did was juz hugged his hands n @ most tym… i was covering my eyes wit my fingers open…. movie ended @ ard 630 pm… but we slacked infront of the p.s 7-eleven wit twinnie eating their munchies s we were damn hungry… after which we headed down to banquet @ raffles hosp for dinner…
half-way thru our dinner.. ard 7 plus or 8 lyk dat… i spotted sumone dat is very familiar… althou i didnt get to c his face… i knew it was him juz frm the way he walked n wit his cap… it dat ex of mine…. hmmm… still have the hart to acknowledge him as mine?? wel… blueks!! dat a******…. twinnies too recognised them.. n tot i didny want to tell hubby coz i noe it will spoil his mood… but den… i did… lyk i xpect… hubby didnt finish his food… but den as soon as we reached bugis j… we totally forget dat incident…
i wanted dis top frm fox… bt it had a low cut v-neck… n hubby wasnt too pleased of getting it for me… bt wen he saw fiqa bought a top… onli den he say i can get it… but den… dun u tink i noe my hubby beta?? of cos i didnt get it… so we walked… n twinnies wanted to take neoprints… but hubby… being his usual self… doesnt want it… n we omoz fite… but den i juz keep quiet coz i dun wan to spoil hubby’s mood…. n den we went to sk… samuek n kevins… hubby bought 2 pair of shirt for himself… i wanted a bag for a sub for my top… but all the bags @ the wallet shop wasnt nice @ all… so i suggested gg to bugis v… at first… we were looking for my bag… but wen i wasnt pleased wit all the collection… we juz looked ard.. until fiqa…. pointed out a pair of jeans… an engineered one thou…NOT!!! but it was nice… hubby told me to try… n so i did… n it fitted juz nice althou its a bit tite… its a square cut… omoz lyk levis jeans… seeing dat i lyk dis pair of jeans sooo much… hubby said he will get it for me… but i requested frm hubby to get one pair for fiqa as well… coz i knew… wen i tried it… n by the look of her face… she too wanted it… so we got two pairs… n hubby wants a pair as well… so he mite b getting it dis wkend… it was 10 plus went we started to feel tired n decided to go home… reaching home ard 1130… my mom nagged…
well…coz dis blardy person… came to my house to get money frm my mom… he said dat i borrowed it to bring it to chalet… but at chalet i was wit hubby…. n it was hubby who gaf me money to spent… i get a hell from mom… n i was in tears wen i come to tink of it… how ruthless ppl cn be wen it comes to money… den on… i decided… he’s nt worth to b called my fren….
tmr im starting my attachement… n now its 0011 hrs… beta go to bed now… or else… i cnt wake up… hubby will b fetching me hm… cnt wait to mit him…
nitez… bye…
today hubby dpt gaji… but we didnt go shopping for ourselves… we went shopping for our rabbit hunny… pity her… omoz 2 wks didn’t change her bedding… coz finished readi… so we bout lotsa new tinks fer her… new food.. shampoo… bedding.. tot of getting toys for her.. but the pet store peepz say it aint necessary… so we didnt…
n the first thing to do wen we got home wasnt change ourselves… althou hubby was drenched.. but we changed hunny’s bedding… she was sooo excited dat she keep peeping @ wat were doing to her cage… but wen it was shampoo tym… she omoz drive me n hubby crazy… she ran away frm us… made a fool out of ourselves while trying to catch her in the kitchen… n after we’re done with dat… we put her back in the cage wit the new bedding… n the first thing she did was poo…. n many… n omoz all over her cage.. we literally had to clean up the cage again…
onli after dat me n hubby went to hougang mall… we gave ourselves a small treat to gelare… our fav ice cream restaurant… but den we went home early today coz hubby is down wit fever after being drenched… n tmr we r going out… so now he’s resting while i blog… im dead meat if he knew dat i slept late…
weeeeee…….
love hubby n hunny…
im soo tired of us owaes fightings… it reali tiring…. n blood sucking… @ tyms i dun even haf a patience level nimore… n we fought becoz of stupid tinks.. n money n werkin is one of the course…. aaaarrrrgggghhhhh!!!!!
$$$$$$!!!!!!!
y does it owaes bothers my life.. n becoz of it im starting to lose him… he’s werking n im not… he doesnt allow… but den again we r owaes short of cash… bt im fine wit it… coz i dun reali spend… n as for him… he nids it for werk… bt we too haf to pay for stuff such as bills… bt we owaes mit dead ends… n wen i said that i wanna werk to help him out… he wudnt allow… now i haf to struggle to pay of my debts… coz he said he doesnt wan to help… so gotta find a job real soon… n find a way to settle those debts…its ok if i haf to werk… im soo used to be in a hardship… let alone havin ppl to help me… sumtyms ppl juz dont appriciate the sacrifice dat i made juz for them…. lyk my mom…
wen my dad was retrenched for omoz 1.5 yrs… its me who worked till late nites… tryin to support myself so as i dun ask money frm my mom as she nids to support 2 of my younger bro… i worked till late n it sort of affects my studies… wen my dad got a job… i quit my job.. so dat i cn haf enuf rez n concentrate on my studies… even dat wasnt appriciated… she said dat im troubling her… whereas all dis while… i dun ask money frm her… unless im reali in dire states… but dats rare coz im still on my sch hols… urgh … i dunno…
now my hubby is putting all the blame on me.. bt den again… its ok… coz den im used to be in hardship… well wats life w/o a rock in it….
gerl… where u??? huhuhu…. dah lame tk umpe ko… asl mcm lari kn diri dari aku gitu??? rindu ko tau… rindu giler babi nye… mane ko??? ape ko uat?? wat happen to u?? aku nk umpe ko… i haf so much to tell u…. i noe u too haf soo much to tell me….
i miss my bez fwen… eva since i lost my hp… i cudnt contact her.. wen i koled she didnt picked up… i cnt sms her… but even if i do usin my bro’s fon… she wnt reply….
i dunno wat went wrong… i juz wish dat i cud mit her… tok to her… n juz hug her tellin her how much i miss her….
i reali miss u gerl….
went out wit hubby today…. hmmmm…. actuali we were @his house… playin’ wit our rabbit… hunny….so cute… gotta see her hop ard n standin’ on 2 feet onli….cute kn… if i haf her pic… i will upload… so u guys cn c k…
hmmmm…. doin nutink actuali… juz watching korean movie…. n missin my hubby… n waitin for my turn to use the fon n tok to him….
love ayg…
muackz….
ayg… u so sick… cnt even tok to u… so sad… i miss u… im watching cite korea kat comp… so sad… nati wen i dah copy dis movie on other cd.. i kasi u tgk pulak k… muackz….
love ayg….
miss my ayg….
muackz….
